Monday, July 7, 2008

Language fit for a princess

Why yes, that is a Disney Princess "tattoo" style bandage on my index finger, why do you ask? It was the closest bandage handy at the time, so there you go. What's that? They're all blushing? I have no idea what could've caused the girls to blush. It certainly couldn't have been the words I uttered when I sliced the side of my finger open on a sharp piece of plastic packaging in the bathroom this morning, because you know I never, ever swear.

What? You heard I dropped the F bomb as I grabbed some TP to staunch the stream of blood? Well... Who ratted me out? I bet it was Cinderella. She's such a goody-goody. Ariel and Belle, they have my back. Jasmine too. (Sleeping Beauty I'm not too sure about, because we haven't watched that one in our house yet - the dragon fight scene makes it off limits for now. So, she might be in cahoots with Cindy - you know how those blonde babes are...)

Well, in my defense, if I did let loose with a curse or two, the kiddo wasn't anywhere remotely within earshot and the cat, who was, doesn't give a flying fig about language. And, I only ever swear when I've caused myself great injury and pain. The rest of the time I've developed a highly specialized vocabulary, thanks to the "little pitcher with big ears" that is usually orbiting within 3 feet of me. The kiddo thinks that when one is cut off in traffic, for example, the appropriate exclamation is "Pickle juice!" Alternatively, one might shout (always with gusto) "CHEESE AND TOAST!" or "ZAMBONI!" I've even eliminated the words "crap" and "stupid" from my vocabulary, thanks to hearing the kiddo repeating after Mommy, at the tender age of 18 months, "crap crap crappity crap!"

I am proud to say the kiddo has never heard either Hubby or me use an actual expletive. Those princesses presently wrapped around my finger, however, well, they heard a few, and if I am going to swear, I'm gonna swear big. Yeah, of course Cinderella was telling the truth about that - like I said, she's a goody-two-shoes. She oughta just be glad it was my index finger that I sliced, not its next-door neighbor... *pbbbbbbbt*


Anonymous said...

I wish I could say the same but the kiddos have heard all kinds of language from us.

They have also watched the movie "School of Rock" (they like the music) and there is some colorful language there too.

We tell them they are grown up words and that is usually enough to keep them from cursing usually.

Anonymous said...

OK that was quite funny Heather....thanks for the giggle

Apple Joos said...

Thanks for your SITS comment! I'm sorry you've had a craptastic day but I'm glad I could have lessed the crap quotient just a bit for you.